Failure Free Society

Evidently, today is Student Appreciation Day at an elementary school near my home. At first glance I thought “Isn’t that nice.” As I thought about it I wondered why it’s necessary to show appreciation to students. They just show up and learn. The teachers and administration are doing all the work. Don’t students have much more to appreciate and less to be appreciated for? I don’t have a negative opinion of children I just don’t remember being publicly appreciated unless I did something to deserve it or it was my birthday. I think I turned out ok. By simply being should not insist that everyone take notice of ME. Should it?

The idea of appreciating or celebrating people who haven’t accomplished anything, in my opinion, is doing more harm than good to the members of our society and especially to kids. Now adults are doing everything in their power to raise the self-esteem of children by doling out praise as if showing up is enough to deserve it. We’ve taken to sheltering kids from any potentially “negative” experiences. It seems as though parents will do all they can to prevent failure of any type.

This reminds me of Theodore Roosevelt’s comments on failure:

It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.

Before we create a society of cold and timid souls let the kids fail from time to time. Let them be selected last in a pickup game, place dead-last in competition, be eliminated in dodgeball, strike-out and then encourage them to go back to do it all again. Perhaps they’ll truly learn to appreciate winning when they’ve actually worked for it or understand the lessons learned when they lose. Don’t be surprised when they thank you for supporting their failures as you do their accomplishments.